Is Life Balance a Myth?

Google life balance, and what you’ll find are 1,920,000 references.  Something of a hot topic!  But is life balance even possible?

When your life feels out of whack, it feels like you don’t ever have enough time to do everything that needs to get done, let alone the things you wish you could do. There are work demands, family demands, and social demands.  So much to know, so much to do.  It’s too much.  And all of today’s technology only makes it worse.  Emails to read and respond to, voicemails to answer, websites to build and maintain, and information bombarding us from all corners.  The advice to “take time off” and “take time for yourself” begins to sound like a bad joke.  It’s enough to make you consider “going off the grid” and getting “back to nature.” 

But there’s no need to go to that extreme.  What it boils down to is…what is important to you?  Balance doesn’t necessarily mean that your life has equal amounts of work and play.  It does mean satisfaction with all the areas of your life.  

It’s about making choices.

I often work with clients to take a look at all their responsibilities and obligations in order to eliminate those that no longer serve them, and to eliminate some of them out of their lives. We also work on learning to say “no”. So many times, I find that people say “yes” out of misplaced obligation or mistaken politeness, when what they really want to do is say NO.  No, they cannot bake ten dozen brownies for the bake sale; no, they don’t want to sit on the condo association board of directors; no, they don’t want to give up a weekend to attend a wedding of distant relation. 

It seems obvious, but you also need to know what you would like your life to look like.  In other words, what is your life vision and what does life balance look like for you?  Yet many (if not most) people live their lives by default rather than choice.  Learn what you value and measure all decisions against your values and vision for your life. Create your life plan, take stock of your personal environments and set about getting your life in balance your way! 

What in your physical and other environments needs adjusting so you can live your best life? You might, for example, survey your environment to see what information input and stimulation you can eliminate or contain.  Do you finish a book that you don’t enjoy because you have to finish everything you start? Why bother?  If it doesn’t grab your interest, return it or toss it.  Are your magazine subscriptions serving you, or are those piles of unread magazines becoming a toleration?  Do you really need to read three newspapers a day?  Might you not be better served to read your news online, and filter it so you only see those articles that are important to you?  You can choose how and when information enters your life, and use technology to make it serve you, instead of the other way around. Consider an Audible subscription (books, magazines or newspapers), one of the book synopsis subscription services like www.aheadspace.com/

I was watching Comedy Central  and a young comedian (Demetri Martin) said that when you wake up each day, you spend the rest of the day making choices.  So “when you decide to wear flip flops, you’re deciding that you will not be running away from people wearing sneakers.”  Whether you make those choices consciously or not is your decision to make.   

Yes, there are times when your life balance will be out of whack, for example when you are on vacation, or have a new baby, or a special project that requires all your attention.  Balance is about the overall equilibrium of your life. 

Or maybe, it’s really not about balance at all…but about integrating all the areas of your life.  An idea worth exploring!